Content to be a minnow in an ocean of big fish Christians
As a home schooling, stay-at-home mom, I am a minnow surrounded by glamorous dolphins and sailfish. These women write best sellers, speak on radio and reach millions for Christ.
I shrink in comparison. Between teaching my girls, doing chores, and driving them to extracurricular classes I wonder if I can do more. I faithfully read my Bible, pray, and, during chores, I listen to Christian radio. I attend a Bible based church and serve part time in children’s ministry. Yet do I do enough for Christ?
Most days I wear no make up or drive far. People might not notice my mascara, when they can look at my cute girls.
My world seems right, until I notice a super mom who holds an outside career, and keeps a perfect home, garden and body. Then I feel like a minnow in the sea.
Yet God made me the way he chose. He knows my strengths and weaknesses, and he can use me, just how I am. He never called me to compare myself with other women. I need to responsibly live my life for Him.
Even if I am a minnow, God sees my value. As I love my children and discipline them for the Lord, I feel God’s face smiling at me even on days when He alone smiles. Sometimes my children become angry over my discipline. My husband may find faults. Temporarily losing family affection hurts. I feel alone, especially when I cannot call a friend for comfort.
This lonely place drives me to the Lord. When I approach him, He always welcomes me. When I have done no wrong, God comforts me. If I made mistakes, He gently reproves me. He offers gentler grace than an angry child or disenchanted husband. God guides me to change and grow.
As a minnow I allow my family to shine in public. My out going husband loves the lime light. I am happy he has a bigger Facebook following, goes out more and has hundreds of friends. I enjoy having others fuss over my girls and ask about their accomplishments and don’t vie for the attention.
I am in God’s spotlight. He adores me. My “insignificance” does not hurt, knowing the God of the universe calls me beloved and has written my name on the palm of his hand (Isaiah 49:16a “See, I have engraved you on the palms of my hands.”)
I accept myself as a minnow in the world’s eyes, but a jewel in God’s. I excel in smaller ways than super Christians. If I ditch my shame and envy, I enjoy the things I do accomplish.
Preparing nutritious food for my girls, strengthens their bodies. Teaching them about God strengthens their spirits, and makes them better able to help others. When I resist their annoyance and limit their screen time, I keep their minds alert and focused. These battles preserve my precious girls’ minds.
As I rejoice in my life others notice. I draw them to me and tell them the reason for my joy. God takes delight in the smallest person, including me. God values me, even when others do not.
At a Chinese fast food restaurant I visited, I wrote every employee’s name. I typed the meaning of their names, including Bible verses. I shared the results with each employee. They all loved it and none expressed disgust.
When God urged me, I purchased children’s Bibles for parents, Bibles in the mother tongue of non-English speakers and gave them to the people I knew.
I purchased Bible booklets and always keep them in my purse. If God compels me, I share one. Sometimes I wonder if I am offending a nonbeliever, but I remember Paul’s words about being a fool for Christ (1Corinithians 4:10), and I do it anyway. I remember Jesus’ words about being ashamed of me before the Father if I am ashamed of Him (Mark 8:38). People have always received the Bibles, and not thrust them back. A Jehovah’s Witness disagreed when I explained Isaiah’s prophecy. Emanuel means “God is with us” and is another name for Jesus. I was gracious, and the man still smiles at me at the grocery store where he works. But he does not know I pray for him, as does his Christian coworker, named Emanuel.
I have noticed minnows flash a silvery color when the sun hits them. Then they seem brilliant and valuable. When I let the Son’s light hit me, I glow for him and offer comfort to beleaguered believers and discouraged unbelievers. I have an influence more valuable than silver. I plant seeds that bring precious souls to the Lord. Even before they invite Him into their hearts I show them our Father values them. At the grocery store, the YMCA, or anywhere I go, I work as an agent for the most powerful, most valuable one, our Lord.
I am the earthly light of my daughter’s lives. If I discipline them, and they say they hate me, I know I am the one who never turns her back on them or stops loving them. I am the most powerful person in their lives. My daughters value no other person more than the one who loves them. I am puny in the world, but oh, so essential to my children and a joy to the people I encourage, (which I aim to do every time I leave the house).
I have busy days when I forget my influence, just as minnows look dark and dim, out of the light. But when I remember to bathe my day in prayer and face the world with God’s joy, my small life is powerful, much stronger than any minnow, for I have God’s power flowing through my little minnow veins. I am significant to my family, the world and especially my Lord.