Patience: Waiting on God is Hard

Why does God make us wait so long, often with no specific idea about what God is planning or the exact process we should follow.  We call this “blind faith,” meaning we trust God, but we are blind about exactly how things will turn out.  For example, God rarely (if ever) says, “Wait for this (exact) time.  Then go to this (exact) place and do this (exact) thing.”  Our confusion and stress is often made worse by people (some who may be “authorities” or at least think they are) who want to rush us.  They question our patient faith and reliance on God.  These rushing people may even have their own agenda for us, insisting we should do what they say and do it soon.

In our hearts, we know we need to rely on the Holy Spirit’s guidance.  Yet these people who rush us diminish the quiet voice of the Holy Spirit, especially if they are authorities or if they claim to love us and thus know what is best for us.

We read about Elijah’s experience with God after Elijah had run away from the scary and murderous Queen Jezebel.  Elijah wanted an answer, but God did not rush to give it.  Even when he did speak, God spoke to Elijah in a whisper, (1King 19:9-18).  This whispered voice offered Elijah comfort and direction about what to do next.  But that whisper would be easy to drown out, when other voices are louder and demanding we act now instead of waiting, as Elijah did.  Sadly these authorities and loved ones can cause us to doubt ourselves and doubt God’s call on our lives.  If we tend to seek validation from others, especially if we are starved for love, we might just rush off and do what they say, when our Spirit-filled hearts tell us to wait.  In our own flesh, waiting is hard, but it becomes even harder when these people rush us.

If we grew up without sufficient validation, we may also believe these people know what is right without earnestly praying and asking God to show us if they are wrong.  Too often these bossy people are wrong.  Sometimes they may be right, and as a result, we assume they are always right.  But only God is always right.

God has given us his Holy Spirit as a down payment for our future life with him in heaven.  For example, in Ephesians 1:14, we see, “The Holy Spirit is the down payment on our inheritance, which is applied toward our redemption as God’s own people, resulting in the honor of God’s glory.”  That means we have the Holy Spirit to guide us until we go to heaven. Furthermore, in 2Cor.1:22, “{God} set his seal of ownership on us, and put his Spirit in our hearts as a deposit, guaranteeing what is to come.”  The Holy Spirit really can guide us.

Even in the Old Testament, King David said, “The Lord will guide you along the best pathways for your life. He will advise you and watch over you,” Psalm 32:8.  While this is a great verse to memorize and claim, actually waiting until God says, “Go,” or “Do,” can be very hard to follow.  We are people of action.  Is there a fire? Grab a fire extinguisher, and if that does not work, call the fire department (via 911).  Do you hurt?  Ads tell you to take a pain killer which you can buy at the drug store. But there are no ads that say, “If you are directionless, do this,” because patience cannot be bottled or sold. We have to live or work out this part of our lives.

Sometimes changes do begin to happen.  A friend told me her angry and ungrateful, adult daughter finally said, “Thank you,” to this very giving and loving mom.  Another friend has a grown son, distraught with anxiety, who finally began to see a counselor.  These changes bring hope, but likely the adult daughter still has many problems in her life and will still often say more mean things to her mom.  The anxious son will still need to heal slowly, and he might not yet have a job.  We do not see full healing in these loved ones, but there are glimmers of hope.

It is harder when the problems are deeply seated, and the loved one is not getting better, at least we cannot see any signs of change.  At these times, we can even doubt our prayers, wondering if we are praying sincerely.  Are we being kind enough?  Are we doing enough?

Some doubts are good, in that we should never assume we are perfect and do not need to change.  We can welcome God into every aspect of our lives, especially when we begin to have a nagging feeling something is wrong in our own life.  We do need to check in with God.  Sometimes that feeling is misplaced, and we truly are loving others well, and we are doing enough.  At other times, we realize we were hiding a selfish pride, a silly worry, or other feeling or attitude that was coming between us and God.  But if we are right with God, then we have to stand firmly, trusting he will give us the strength to wait as long as he calls us to wait.

I once heard that patience means doing something else while you wait, thus not thinking about the matter you really want when no answer is currently available.  This is not a crutch but a genuine way of waiting on the Lord.  Elizabeth Elliot said that after her husband was murdered and she did not know what to do next, she did the chores she knew she really had to do. There were many chores, and these filled days and weeks.  Somehow this kept her going until God revealed his next plan for her life. 

In our lives, we can consider the things we need to do, and we know we are called to do, whether they are the boring but essential chores, or more exciting things.  When we give our heart to the things we know we need to do, and I do mean invite Jesus into our life, as we do these things, peace really can come.  I believe this is a huge gift of faith, which God gives us, because this peace is supernatural. The world does not understand this peace.  We can tell God that although we do not know what to do about the matter God has NOT given us direction for, or for the matter God has not healed (loved one, relationship, job, etc.), we will trust him anyway. 

Habbakuk used this kind of faith, when Israel was in chaos.  He realized there might be horrible times ahead, yet he said in Hab. 3:16-19, “Yet I will wait patiently for the day of calamity to come on the nation invading us.  Though the fig tree does not bud and there are no grapes on the vines,  though the olive crop fails and the fields produce no food, though there are no sheep in the pen and no cattle in the stalls, yet I will rejoice in the Lord, I will be joyful in God my Savior. The Sovereign Lord is my strength; he makes my feet like the feet of a deer, he enables me to tread on the heights.”  The world would call this man, and his patient faith, a fool.  The world would (and will if you do this) mock you and say, “Your only answer is to pray. That is no answer. You are not acting fast enough.”  I have heard these exact words when I was waiting on the Lord during a very hard time. 

Yet, the patient faith the world mocks, is what God calls us to have.  I recently memorized Romans 12:12, “Rejoice in our confident hope.  Be patient in trouble and keep on praying.”  I clung to these verses when a certain angry person was accusing me of not having a plan and of being a fool for “Only praying,” (his words).  I did not pray alone either. I enlisted others who know and love the person I was praying for.  We all prayed for the suffering person.  God heard our prayers.

Please be aware Satan also hates our patient faith.  Not only will the world mock, but the devil will stir up even more trouble, at times just before deliverance comes. This happened when so many of us were so fervently praying.  So many bad things happened, and the angry person was convinced I was a fool for my prayers and patience.  But I stayed at it, not because I was doing nothing. I was doing everything I could not, not just in the spiritual realm (praying), but also addressing anything I could change in myself and anything I could do to physically (and emotionally) help the hurting person.  I was not passively waiting, but actively doing so.

God brought deliverance!  Is this person fully healed? No, but she has healed so much and she is feeling more stable and even able to read her Bible again.  Yet I was careful to not say, “I told you so,” to the unbeliever who mocked me.  I know this would not soften his heart. 

The key to Christian patience is listening to the Holy Spirit, via your quiet time with Him.  When you read your Bible, ask God for guidance.  I shared, in an earlier post “Joy in Prayer Journaling,” that prayer journaling also helps us to lift our prayers to God, as we examine the Bible and meditate on what God is telling us.  When we read our Bible with a sincere heart, yearning to hear from God, and when we pray and also listen for his quiet response (may not be audible, but an impression in our thoughts, from God), God directs us.  Not all answers come quickly.  I am still praying for salvation for the angry man I mentioned.  I have prayed this for over 15 years.  He is still not saved.  Some would tell me to give up on my prayers for him.  But as long as I live and he lives, I will pray for him. 

My patient faith comes from God’s faithfulness. I could not be patient with God if I had never received any answers. He has answered many of my prayers, in the affirmative.  And when he has denied my requests (plenty of those too), he has always provided for me anyway.  He has been faithful to me my entire life. Plus I have the testimonies of other godly people, from saints in the Bible to people I have met or heard of, for whom God has been faithful all their lives too. 

Waiting patiently for God reminds me of my struggle (as a teen) with my second winter in Ohio.  We had moved there from ice-free Florida.  By my second winter, I missed the warmth of Florida and the green plants. I thought I was going crazy. I thought I had to flee, via a vacation, to the Caribbean (but I was a teen and had no money). I actually checked the travel ads each day, looking to see if any low cost flight would show up.  But gradually something happened.  I was looking at the ads less often, and one day I realized I had not looked at the ads for many days.  When I looked outside, I realized the snow was mostly melted, and I even saw some green sprouts peeking out.  I realized I did not need a Caribbean vacation (which neither I nor my parents could afford).  I just needed the snow to melt, and I needed to see some green life.  In a sense I had used my limited patience, (by looking at the flight ads and dreaming of a much warmer place), until the snow melted, and I felt relief.   

I did not use any spiritual discernment at that snowy time. I was young and a bit silly.  But my patience then reminds me of times now in my life when hope seems so small. Yet like that winter snow, problems can diminish.  Maybe not all of my problems will diminish (like unsaved loved ones I may go to my grave praying for), but many of these problems have diminished.  I have seen healing in my life and in my loved ones’ lives.  God is faithful when I pray sincerely and wait for him. Whether or not he gives me the answer I want, he loves me and cares for me.

I pray we have blessed you with this post.  It has come out of suffering in my life and the joy I feel from God’s love when I waited patiently for him to answer me and provide for me.  Even in his silence I feel his love and know he is faithful.