Showing off in the news and in social media, actors, musicians, artists and influencers imply they are better than us, so we must copy them. In essence, they want us to compare ourselves to them and feel shame when we differ from them.
Even in church, we may believe Bible heroes or even other church members are more righteous than we are, and we must do more. Or we might compare our performance today with what we could do years ago and believe we are failing.
So what does God say about who you are and what you do? We might remember verses about ourselves in general. We read Psalm 139:13-14 “You made my inmost being; you knit me together in my mother’s womb. I praise you for I am fearfully and wonderfully made,” and conclude God created us well, but maybe we aren’t so good anymore. We know our sin nature (Jer.16:12 “The heart is deceitful above all things and desperately wicked. Who can know it?”) and Romans 3:23“For all have sinned and fallen short or the glory of God.” We know our sin nature is wicked and corrupt, but what about the side of us that is redeemed, made new? Is she good enough? Should you do as much as other people? Should you dress like them, act like them, witness as much, minister as much, pray as much?
When we compare ourselves with people in the media or our church, we do ourselves harm. We may not realize we (or our loved ones) are doing this. Comparisons creep up gradually. We feed these unfavorable comparisons when we don’t recognize and give thanks for what we already have and for who we already are (and for what we already do well). I’m sure Satan and his demons want us to forget our many gifts and then covet what others have and then feel inferior for not having those gifts. (Exodus 20:17 “You shall not covet …. anything that is your neighbor’s.”)
I suspect this is hardest for the younger gals and guys. With Smart Phones and 24 hour access to social media, these sweet young gals and guys see people who are photo shopped, air brushed and who have altered their natural bodies. These people can afford personal make up artists and hair dressers, and they would never stand in front of the camera unless they feel they look perfect.
Speaking for gals, if a gal does not strongly feel her father’s love, she is more vulnerable to believing herself unattractive or not talented. If her mother has a critical spirit, this worsens the gal’s pain. So we older gals can come alongside the tweens, teens and gals in their 20’s and 30s and encourage them. We must face the spiritual aspect of this attack. We need to pray against these false beliefs our younger gals (and boys) feel. We need to pray against these lies in our own hearts too. If we feel a restless spirit, without contentment, beware. If we (or our young people) feel inferior or find ourselves (or them) envying others, we have fallen for Satan’s lies.
The first step is to recognize this emotional and spiritual state. Next, rebuke it by Jesus’ blood. Pray anyway you want, and here is a sample prayer: “The Lord rebuke you, Satan. I will not give in to this disquieting lack of contentment. I have all I need in Christ.” Enlist your prayer warriors to pray for you. If you have so many confusing feelings, consider talking to a truly Christian counselor. Ask her or him questions to make sure she or he truly loves Jesus, follows the Bible and understands you. God can guide you to rebuke this malcontent in yourself or your loved one.
Then remember to give thanks. List every positive quality about yourself you can think of, not in vanity but in gratitude. For example, “Lord, thank you I can walk, unlike people in a wheel chair,” and “Thank you God I can hear.” You can go on to personal gifts, whether you sing well, have a welcoming smile, have a good mind for a subject in school, etc. Then add thanks for your opportunities, such as “Thank you I can safely go to school for free. In too many countries, girls don’t get to go to school.” Give thanks for your provisions, such as, “Thank you God I have a roof over my head.” When we compare our good gifts to the losses of others, such as people in war torn countries, we have so much to give thanks for.
Now a caution: Please grieve your losses. I mentioned this in my post, “Embracing Grief.” Please feel your righteous anger and work out a plan of confronting evil when you can or working out a disagreement with another person. If you are sinning, repent and ask God to redirect you. If you suffer depression, seek help as you need from a professional and from an understanding support group. Get the medical and spiritual help you need. I am not over looking the serious matters in life when I say we need caution against comparing ourselves. But once these other issues are addressed, ask God to help you to see this tendency in comparing yourself. And if you are helping a younger gal (or guy), come alongside her so she can recognize this comparing and see the sorrow comparisons bring. Ask God to fill you with his joy and to help you count your strengths and blessings so you can give thanks.
Thank God, then begin to thank others. Write down names of people who bless you (if unnamed, thank God for him or her, based upon the job, such as thanking God for the kind waitress). If you have the ability, thank each of these people personally. If you can think specifically of how they bless you, tell them. You will bring joy to them and yourself as you see them smile. Often they will thank you back for things you didn’t remember, but you did for them too.
Jesus said the first commandment is to “Love the Lord your God with all your heart and soul, and with all your mind” and then he said “the second is like it; you shall love your neighbor as yourself, (Matt.22:37b-39).
Let God first fill you with love, then let it spill out onto others. God gave these two commands, because he knew how much joy they could bring to us (loving him and others). God can help you or your loved one recognize this spirit of comparison. You can begin to heal from this sad state. God loves you and did a great job making you. I pray you were blessed by this post. Thanks for joining us.